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..... Nov. 15th, 2010 @ 07:37 pm

....... fuck.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


Nov. 4th, 2010 @ 12:20 am
Just close your eyes
And count to five
Let's craft the only thing we know into surprise

Set down your glass
I painted this
To look like you and me forever as we're now

And I'm shaken, then I'm still
When your eyes meet mine, I lose simple skills
Like to tell you all I want... is now.
.music.: Snow Patrol. Set Down Your Glass

Starlight Apr. 20th, 2010 @ 12:23 am
I just wanted to hold you in my arms....
.mood.: indescribableindescribable

Hmm. Jun. 29th, 2009 @ 07:07 pm
Here's my once-in-a-while update to my LiveJournal. Coming back here is like opening up a time capsule for me. Very few people I friended on here still use their LiveJournals. And chances are, nobody else will read this post, except maybe months from now. But I have something itching in the back of my mind that I feel like I have to write down.

First of all, an update. I'm in Grand Rapids for the summer. Copy editing internship at the Grand Rapids Press. Living with two other CMU journalism students interning at the same place. So far, it's going well. Doing some good work. And I like the people I work with, although I haven't went on too many bar trips yet. The job is mostly page design and proofreading, so it does get kind of monotonous, but I'm pretty good at it and time goes by when you're busy with things to do. That's how I get through 4 a.m.-noon shifts. Going to bed at 8 p.m. is depressing no matter how you look at it, though.

But this internship is teaching me something about myself, I think. I've always talked highly of Grand Rapids. My most memorable moments in this city was Business Professionals of America for two years, when we stayed at Amway. Visited again for Michigan Press Association Awards. Always wanted to live here for a period of time... and now I am. But to be absolutely honest, I'm not enjoying it as much as I thought I would. Not because I don't like Grand Rapids. It's still a pretty awesome city, probably the best in the state. Nothing to do with my internship, as I said, I'm enjoying that, too.

What's bothering me is that I'm further away from home, I think. Saginaw. It's not a real troublesome thing, but it's one of those things that itches in the back of your head, and the only way you can scratch it is by hopping into your car and taking the drive home. There's so many things I want to do. Spend time at my house and hang out with my family. See all my friends, or at least the ones I've maintained over the last 4 college years. See Allen at the mausoleum. Go to Frankenmuth to play the machines. Party at "the house." Go to the bars on Hamilton Street. The list goes on.

I began thinking the other day- if I could pick one newspaper to work at for the rest of my life. There are many newspapers I thought of working for somewhere down the line. St. Petersburg Times comes to mind first. Grand Rapids Press is up there, too. But you know what came to mind first for working at the rest of my life? The Saginaw News. No joke. I would take a job as an online guy or a prep sports reporter there over many bigger jobs any day. At this point in my life, it seems like the right way to go. Now I know why people have such a hard time leaving home, even with such ambitious goals.

Look, I'm not stupid. I know I can't live in the past, and I'm not going to. If my life leads me outside of Michigan, so be it. The age of 22 is way too early to be having life reflections... I've spent half my day today reading old LiveJournal entries, from both my accounts, piecing together the person I became now.

It all teaches me one thing. No matter where I end up, no matter what I'm doing, NONE of it will compare to Saginaw, Michigan for me. No matter how high it ranks in the nation in crime, or poverty, it is my home, where I grew up and where, deep down, I hope I am buried one day.

That is all for now. I would say I'll update again soon, but as you can probably tell, I don't update this thing much. Last update way May 2008. Go figure.
Current Location: Grand Rapids
.mood.: indescribableindescribable
.music.: Dredg

I took my love down to violet hill, there we sat in the snow... May. 7th, 2008 @ 11:25 pm
 Not too much has changed since yesterday. Eight-hour days at the Saginaw News are going to dominate my summer. Part of me cares, but part of me doesn't. I haven't really gotten out much since I started, but I think once I get used to the schedule, I'll be okay. 

There's been quite a few differences working at the News than at CM Life. For one, deadline is 9:15 a.m. during the week because it's an afternoon paper. That means I actually START the day working on deadline, helping out with little things to get the paper out. Once 9:30 passes by, the rest of the day is pretty laid back, kind of like mid-day at a CM Life production day. I typically get 1-2 assignments each day and other than a feature story that's not due until Friday, I've gotten my assignments in without too much of a problem.

Today, I did a story on a pseudorabies virus that was found in 19 swine in Saginaw County. Did it in two and a half hours. I think it's pretty good, could easily run on 1 or 3, but we'll see. Haha.

By the way, Coldplay's new song "Violet Hill" rocks. It's quite different from their other stuff, but really, if you read the lyrics and listen, it's so good. It really makes you think. Can't wait for this album... a month away or so!

I should head to bed though, so goodnight. Work from 8 to 4:30 again tomorrow... I can smell the weekend coming on fast, though.
.mood.: calmcalm
.music.: Coldplay - "Violet Hill"
Other entries
» Who wants money? As long as there's some honey
The first half of my day was pretty productive. Churned out my 5th story for my public affairs class, so one more to go by Friday. I finished my last project for my graphic arts class, and I got good notes for my exam review for my English lit class. That does it for classwork until Monday when exams start.

After that... not so productive. Never went to the store, didn't do laundry and I have yet to get the dishes done here (it's my turn). Oops. I played catch, watched the Tigers obliterate the Rangers 19-6 and played Rock Band. Passed Timmy & The Lords of the Underworld and Tom Sawyer on Expert. Nice.

I think I'll get laundry done tomorow morning... getting up at 9 will be more refreshing than 7-fucking-30 anyways. Then I work at 11. Assuming I get out at about 10:30 or 11 at night, I'll be going to the bar, probably with Joel or Rob. Should be fun. Friday will be spent prepping the apartment for the banquet parties. 

One more week or so and I'm back in Saginaw. Looking forward to seeing some people... especially work and barhopping. Looking forward to several nights at the cabin, doing some jetskiing and tubing, getting back on the treadmill, seeing old friends, etc... It kind of sucks not to be in Mount Pleasant for 4 months, but hey, it'll be fine.

Joe's singing songs, so I'm off to the other room.
» yeah, yeah, yeah, another update
I spent the last couple hours reading entries I made in here back in 2004.

I've changed... a lot. So has a lot of people I've known.

It was tough reading entries that dealt with Allen. I'm reminded of some of memories with him in them, especially the cardboard box movie we made for my marketing class. I am going to miss that kid so much. He was one of a kind and did not deserve what had happened to him.

Reading entires with Dan and Matt in them, too, just make me look that much more forward to the summer, to hang out with Dan and Brendon in particular. Back in the day it was usually four of us hanging out in my basement playing games and watching movies. Now it's moreso going bar hopping and drinking the week away. Hah- sounds like we're getting older.

Then I got into the entries with Katie.... mid to late May 2004, when we began. Despite everything that transpired, I look back on those moments as some of my favorites. And those are the ones that will stick out to me, not the dark moments that took place not too long ago. It just takes time... Katie and I are going to be good friends again, I have no doubt on that. Very few, if any, understand me or care about me as much as she does.

But for now, I should probably get some sleep. Gotta get up at about 10 to work on a story for class at noon. I'm actually wondering if I'll be able to do it or not. Goodnight.
» We're no strangers to love.
 It's been a productive day. Got a 3-page paper turned in. Got a project completed and turned in. Now I just have to finish one more project, one more small story for my public affairs reporting class and that's that. At least until next Monday when exams start.

Yet another 12-hour day at work, of course, but it was pretty good. I didn't do much because I'm training news editors for the fall, but time didn't really slow down at all. Only two more work days and I'm done with CM Life until August, when I turn into Mr. Football Reporter again. 

Tomorrow (well, today) will be my last busy day of the week. Class from noon to 5, in which I have to finish the project and story, plus take notes for exam review. Then I have to do laundry, clean up the apartment a little more, take cans/bottles back and get some groceries. 

Still thinking about Friday, too. Can't wait... it's the apartment's last big party of the school year, so it better count. Plus, I have date, and hopefully that turns out really well too. Just sucks that it's bad timing- if we really hit it off, we'll be spending 3-4 months of the summer about 90 minutes away from each other. Ah well.

I return to Saginaw on May 2nd or 3rd... those are Friday and Saturday. Mark your calendars.
» (No Subject)

Holy shit, it's been an eternity since I wrote in here. Two years, to be exact. And after reading through latest entries on here, so much has changed with me. Good and bad.

So let me use this entry to make those updates.

- I'm single now. Won't get into that story.

- Still working at the campus newspaper... as a News Editor now, though. Went from staff reporter to Lifeline Editor to Assistant Sports Editor to Summer Editor-in-Chief to football reporter. And now this. I don't mind it too much, i guess, but I'm never doing it again. It just takes way too much time and my classes are paying for it.

- I have an internship locked up with the Saginaw News for this summer. I'm planning on St. Petersburg, Florida, next summer. Two of our interns went there the last two years so I figure they'll take a third. Right?

- I'm living off-campus at Lexington Ridge with a couple good friends. Constantly meeting new people... that part's been a blast, especially as of late. My St. Patrick's Day weekend was crazy. My cousin Joel and I got drunk with 4 girls in Jamestown while people came and went, including my roommates. 

- Still go to Saginaw every now and then... mostly to hang out with Dan and Brendon and whoever. But lately, I've been having Friday dinners with my parents, which have been really nice. Makes me miss them... but hey, I'll be living with them all summer. Screw finding an apartment to lease for 3 months.

- Still going to CMU, obviously. My GPA's dropping. It's gone from a 3.62 freshman year to a 3.52 sophomore year to a 3.41 so far junior year. But this semester's classes have been alright. No C's yet.

- I played poker one time (very recently, too) in the past year or so, i think- and won the pot. Wasn't very big, about $30, but some girl that I met that night was pretty impressed, and... yeah.

- I still own the '97 Malibu, but I'm looking into a new car. This thing's going to die soon, I know it. I have engine cables being held together with a zip tie, for shit's sake.

- TV Shows: The Office and Scrubs. Movies: Too many to list. Games: Smash Bros. Brawl, Rock Band, Call of Duty 4. 

That's about it of my updates... now I can regularly update this thing again without the awkwardness of what things were like in 2005/06 and in 2008. Watch, though, I won't update this thing for like another 2 months. I doubt it; I've had a crave to write in a journal and going back to this thing is probably the best idea at this point.

Plus, no one's reading. Right?

» Passenger

She throws her handbag in a compartment above,
To sit down quickly and exhale with relief
She feels respite after a stressful hour,
After two long weeks of personal tension
She listens in on the settling passengers,
Hearing faint words of a severe winter storm
She notices the snow as it smears her window,
And paints everything in an ominous white

A nearby attendant provides her a drink,
And the pilot gives his usual speech
She feels illness as the plane takes motion,
And flies into the western skies
She attempts to lay back on the quivering seat,
Remembering the week that had slowly passed
Her reddened face felt dry from her tears,
Desperate to find a sense of heartsease

The movie plays to quiet the passengers
The turbulence dims to a steady shake
Her eyelids begin to weigh a little more
While her body sinks into the cozy seat...
She remembers racing into the darkened terminal
All hands and limbs were taken by baggage
Her boarding pass was shaking in her fingers
As she waited in line for that security measure

The metal detector discovered her jewelry
Her luggage was checked repeatedly for safety
Sweat ran down her cheerless face
As she grabbed her handbag and continued on
The winter approached and conjured a storm
The monitor updated with another delay
Emotions were stirring and brought her to tears
Leaving her helpless in a lonely place...

* * * * *

Her body awakens nearly two hours later,
Her eyes open to the seat before her,
She shakes her head to piece back her mind,
And turns it left to peer out her window,

To find herself in Wonderland.

~Brian Manzullo
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